The music in my head is all-encompassing. It's like an unwanted soundtrack that is there constantly. I consider it malpractice for a doctor to have prescribed me these meds, which have caused the incessant tones.
My mood dropped yesterday after my phone call, it is still low. I do not like this combination of medication, and I have a feeling it is the lithium that is causing me pain. I have an appointment on Wednesday, whereby I will try to address the music and come up with some semblance of a plan for making me feel better. I don't know if the answer is dropping medication, or adding. My physician is not a psychiatrist, so I don't even think she'll know what to do.
I could handle the isolation, the mood swings, the flatness, and the side effects, but it is just torture to have to have this music along with it.
My mood will be better soon and I will be able to lift my spirits again. It is really a matter of getting away from my birth family and recognizing that the agonizing child abuse, hallmark of the environment in which I was raised, does not have to be the norm. I can grow up and be my own person.
No comments:
Post a Comment